calliopes_muse

This isn't my fic. I'm posting it as a favor for my fellow Otalia fic writer KateLouise until she gets her LJ up and running. I loved it and I hope you all do too.

Title: What Should Happen Next
Fandom: Otalia
Rating: G
Disclaimer: Not mine, they belong to CBS.
Spoilers: For the latest episode, yuppers.
AN: My first ever fanfic of any kind so be gentle please

Hell this is my first post here period lol.

She pushes, she questions because she has to know. Well, she knows already, of course she knows, but she is hoping against hope that there is some other explanation. She sees this beautiful, strong, proud woman weeping, no, keening, her body bowing close to breaking under the weight of some unbearable pain and she knows she is the cause. So Natalia pushes.

And then Olivia screams the truth, and she is struck dumb. She feels the repeated whisper filled with such sadness and finality like an aftershock following an earthquake. Her thoughts are churning with the horror of this nightmare, the vision of this weeping beauty with a knife piercing her heart and she, Natalia, is the one twisting it and pushing it farther in. Eyes wide Natalia searches Olivia’s face unsure of what to do next, so accustomed to looking to the woman before her for assurance and direction. But Olivia’s eyes are closed, her arms wrapped protectively around her own stomach as her body is wracked by sobs. And all Natalia can think is “This is my fault.” Then something snaps, and Natalia is running. She is running to her. She covers the distance between them, which had once felt like miles, in just a few moments. She takes the sobbing woman’s face between her hands and rests her forehead against the others and begs.

Natalia begs forgiveness over and over knowing that it will never be enough. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. Please, I’m so sorry.”

Olivia’s eyes are open now and staring confusedly at the other woman who is so tantalizingly close. “ I knew, of course I knew, we both knew. But I thought if I tried, if I just pushed it away that it would be okay, that I could keep everyone from getting hurt, but I didn’t.... I didn’t think.... I just..... Oh God I’m sorry, so.... so.... sorry.”

She continues whispering her apologies, punctuating them with small kisses on Olivia’s cheeks, where the tears from moments before are still tracing their way down her cheeks. “I’ll kiss them away,” she thinks, “I’ll kiss them away, like it never happened, like none of it ever happened.”

The look in Olivia’s eyes is no longer confusion but disbelief, her hands move up to hold Natalia’s arms in a vice grip, her body and mind warring between pushing away or pulling her closer, the conflict leading to her staying absolutely and impossibly still. Olivia’s eyes search the other woman’s face, she too having come to rely on the other’s judgment. “I.. I don’t know.....”

Her voice falls away as the emotion of the day and the unexpected reaction of her declaration finally drain her of everything she has. “I do, do you hear me,” Natalia moves her hands to cup the back of Olivia’s head. “I do.”

She stares poignantly into the other woman’s eyes, making sure she knows the significance of speaking those words to her, instead of who she had foolishly agreed to say them to. Then, ever so slowly, Natalia touches her lips to Olivia’s, putting all of her promise and sorrow and regret into this one kiss. The still frozen Olivia can do nothing for fear of somehow ruining this perfect moment. Without thinking and without stopping the kiss, Natalia whispers against the other woman’s lips, “I’m in love with you.”

And then Olivia is undone. She can take no more and the relief of the words just spoken break her in two and she falls into Natalia’s arms. The tears have returned, but this gasping, hiccoughing cry is one of immense relief. Natalia just holds her, keeps her standing. She knows that, if need be she will carry her, cradled in her arms all the way home. And she will, she’ll take Olivia home, leave the rest of the world behind and bring her family home.